I'm rooting for the Billy Goat.

Bernstein will have to fight off panicked Cubs fans today. Ya know, the ones that believe in curses.

Bernstein: "The ones who also name their pets and kids after everything Cubbies!!"

Bernstein (Mocking Dumb Fan Voice): "Oh, Ernie got an A on his spelling test - we are such proud parents!! We've also taught Ivy how to scratch at the door when she needs to go out!! The load of bricks will be delivered on Friday so we can build a nice bricked grill in the backyard!!"

Bernstein (Back to Normal): "Stop, people!! Stop!! They are just a team!! It's just a game!! Stop embarrassing yourselves!!"

Beardown: "Chill out, Dan... geez!"

Bernstein: "You wound me up, Beardown... IT'S. ALL. YOUR. FAULT!!"

Godfella:

Beardown: "Leave this to the professionals, Godfella!"

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"This is Chicago, my friend. Anything can happen."

Liquid lunch?

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Is Rozner on today? That stupid fuck couldn't stop talking about how worried the Dodgers should've been about Kershaw on short rest.

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

Bernstein: "Here's this, from Joe Sheehan's newsletter...[11 minutes later]'...and it's that variance that leaves the Cubs where they are now.' Coming up, we have Matt Bowen, then there's a FanGraphs thing I want to get to, something that really puts the variance we've seen into proper perspective, from one of their really, really smart baseball people. Coming up right here, on WSCR 670 The Score, and 670TheScore.com."

Not bad. You missed a couple of "Girl Chained to Beardown's Furnace" references, along with Goff, Drinky, and Mitch.

All in all, I give it 3 Hanleys.

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SIGH These. Cubs. Players. Are. Kids. They don't know anything about curses or black cats or choking. Addison Russell was 9 years old in 2003! He doesn't care! Here's an email from Rudy...

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Back off, Warchild. Seriously.

Why is anyone mentioning a curse? (Unless this is a Bernstein straw man)

Cubs are tied 1-1 and lost to one of the best pitchers in baseball history.

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THERE. IS. NO. CURSE. Rizzo and Russell are choking independently of all previous Cub chokers.

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The Court will accord substantial deference to the government's immigration policies, particularly those that implicate matters of national security.

Correct!

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Maddon brought the curse with him from Tampa.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Javy Baez was sent by God to defeat the evil demons that inhabit Wrigley Field.

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Two hits and no runs against a guy who didnt have his curveball working for him that night and all you needed was a single run to make it a game.

Anyone who doesn't believe in the curse is an idiot.

God, I hate you.

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It's not a curse. They're just Cubby Occurrences.

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-- source

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The Court will accord substantial deference to the government's immigration policies, particularly those that implicate matters of national security.

Even better, it's Hub.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

I caught some of Bernstein on that FOX SPORTS 1 Cubs show they did.

Bernstein doesn't look healthy.

For a guy with a pretty stress free life who claims to eat healthy and work out every day it doesn't make sense that he looks like he's 70 years old.

But in that show Bernstein did his Bernstein thing. Staring straight into the camera, talking slow and authoritative as he lectured the world about the Cubs. It made me laugh.

I was all set to give it a listen until a) I heard Hub and b) Bernstein started a story with, "You'll appreciate this." Kiss of fucking death, that.

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Having Terry back on air just as the Cubs miss the World Series is going to be a tough listen.

Terry's going to slip back into corpse mode.

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

Yeah, well, when drinky said that to me it was different times. The culture at the SCORE has changed. Everybody there has evolved. He would never say something so vulgar and disgusting in this new climate.

Bernstein just said the previous two games before yesterday "vaulted Jordan Howard into ROY consideration"

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

He lights up callers who care about stupid awards such as ROY.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

Dan and Hub now discovering the Dodgers are....goot!

And have had lots of players on the DL, et al...

Things you never knew...

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Ба́бушка гада́ла, да на́двое сказа́ла—то ли до́ждик, то ли снег, то ли бу́дет, то ли нет.

Did they think they were playing the Twins? Every team that makes the MLB playoffs are "good". They all have 90 + victories for the love of God.

And he says "SIGH These. Cubs. Players. Are. Kids. They don't know anything about curses or black cats or choking. Addison Russell was 9 years old in 2003! He doesn't care!"

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God, I hate Bernstein. The Cubs fans are nore level-headed now because of "generational turnover." Go fuck yourself, you little pussy.

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Rodewald going somewhere but isn't allowed to say where.

Edit: Ever since this iOS 10 the keyboard works worse.

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Elections have consequences.

Okay, that was funny shit.

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